kecewa

sigh~!

again kecewa~

i dont know what is wrong with me.

there is spark!

but there isn't any.

might have spark, but nothing~!

when will there is anything happen?

finally~!

finally i went off to tell my mum what happened to my results.

what have i done badly, so and so~

i never thought she will say it's okay!

kind of suprise and terharu~ hehe

but now i have built confidences.

oh well, sooner or later, it will be alright.

gambatte!

aim? not really. :)

Oh well, who cares 2010 have passed in like 7 days already.

i still can post on what my aim is right? :)

anyway, not much of an aim actually.

bcos, every year is pretty much the same.

yeah, u know, study harder, be a better person, so and so.

haha. erm i might still have the study hader aim still.

but see how. haha.

new aim would probably get new handphone~!

as well as trying to be cute as many times as possible. hahahaha.

perasan giler dowh.

bosan ni! x tau nak buat apa.

adehh.

2010!

we gonna enter 2010 in like 6 hours and 30 minutes more.

it's 530 at the moment.

what do you wish for for this new year? = )

well i got a few one. but will try to post it later on. just wanted to wish everyone HAPPY NEW YEAR 2010! :)

this is what i felt for myself~!

what does life means to you?

how does you feel about yourself?

have you ever felt small in this big world of yours?

*sigh*

that is what i felt this passed few weeks or for this current month.

i wasn't in myself these days. really not in the mood most of time.

does not felt like hanging out much.. but like to be in an 'alone mood'.

talking with friends indeed a good feeling.

but sometimes in this world, i don't think i have friend who really be there for me. really am not~

raise your hand if you ever be on my side the whole time when i'm down, when i'm crazy, when i'm not myself, when i'm annoying, when i'm became undecided~!

is there anyone who really there for me for the bad and okay moment?

sometimes i doubt there is.

though life makes you understand and experience it.

i'm not one of those who really tough.

i got my moments~!

i can be VERY emotional when i want too!

i can be annoying when i feel like it.

i can be over the top when i like it.

now i don't feel like studying!

yes, u heard me right.

i don't feel like studying anymore.

for not getting good grades in university is very bad for me!

i felt sooo damn not confident!

low esteem overcome me.

computer science is not what i wanted to do.

i have not choice. though these days, people said there is.

for some people, there isn't!

i wanted to do business.

i wanted to be a baker.

i wanted to be anything that is not IT things.

when you're not into something, okay for me, i don't even want to do anything.

but what can i change things that happen to me at this time?

*feeling small indeed*

PS will post on new year aim soon! i am still thinking what is my aim.

post-Christmas~!

it's 26 December now.

kinda a post Christmas. this year did not manage to go to any Christmas open house.

it's okay, next year always there. haha.

anyway, my sister is going to study overseas.

small amount of people at home, but its okay.

she will be back. :)

at the moment i'm waiting for my cousin to come from jb.

so we can send my sister at the airport.

can't wait. i like airport. haha

not much to talk about.

classes will start this monday.

excited but not so.

lazy but fun.

not that brave yet try to be one. XD

gambatte aqela!

*away and happy without lame stuff*

away and away.. :)

forgetting what bad stuff had happen.

everything seems okay these days.

me seems a bit better than before as well.

thanks for the people who help me motivated.

thanks to u guys, my friends~! :)

i understand the world is tough.

and tough girl eat chocolate.

haha. been okay, therefore wont be opening fb for a while. just blog and email.

but rarely update an entry.

if i did update, it always lame stuff. haha

sbb xde apa nak ckp.

waiting for semester baru nak bukak.

x sabar dh nak ni. haha.

anyway, u guys wont see me online for a long time yeah~ :P

heee. see u around.

team jacob, aqela.. weeee~!

away and far away. =)

hey peeps~
i wont be online for a few days.
got stuff to do.
haha. anyway, got annoyed on something.
said something and question a few questions.
but those questions was 'disalah faham' and i was to blame.
kata cuba offended the faculty. but my motive is sincere.
i really just asking whether.. ok, whatever la.
but i really intended to ask not to offend anyone.
kekadang faculty pun bodoh. ckp english x paham.
pelik. makan hati la jugak. tp maybe ada hikmah. :)
hurm xpe la. i learnt from it.
lain kali x yah tanya soklan. :) haha
anyway, wont be online for a while. really busy these days..

PS to nat, u keep in touch wit me ya. got something to spill up. hahaha. i know u gonna read this. but yeah.. :)

when ur heart is broken

haven't been good for 2 days. frustrated.

maybe it is something for me to learn again.

but i'm tired already.

no motivation anymore.

lots of friends have been helping me motivate.

some doesnt care.

but most of all i'm totally devastated.

can i just drop out?

*bengkak mata dh*

when boredom + low self esteem rule u life~

*sigh*

boredom + self esteem took over me again!

haha.

had a great morning.

boring evening.

night? haha. gonna fins something to do.

tomorrow i'm going off to JB to meet up my aunties, uncles and cousins before my sister heading of to the US to continue her studies.

nanti on 25hb Dec pun g jumpa sedara jugak. :P adehh. haha

damn, i'm so busy this holiday~!

on the 13hb Dec i will need to be back to college for feseni camp.

aaargh, i really hate my life u see~!

at the same time i felt a bit of self esteem on certain things.

though i gave a few advices to some juniors, but i myself does not believe in myself either.

so ironic~!

oh well, give motivate me please! *weak smile*

till then, jacob black rocks!